Sports
BREAKING: 2026 Winter Games are coming to Park City, Utah
PARK CITY, Utah — It is official, the 2026 Winter Games have been awarded to Park City, Utah.
In an unprecedented move Milan-Cortina, Italy, has forfeited hosting the 2026 Games citing lack of snow due to rising temperatures and global warming. Park City, Utah was the only registered alternate location and is now slated to host the 2026 Winter Games.
This news comes as an incredible shock to many locals including Karen Naysayer of Silver Creek. Naysayer told TownLift, “This has to be the most egregious disregard for resident quality of life I have seen in my 3 months of living in Park City after moving from Los Altos, California.” She plans to form a PAC under the name “Say No To The O” with hopes of raising $500,000 to pay for legal fees in suing the governing body. She also plans to organize a protest at the UOP later this week.
Unlike the normal competitive bid process, which typically takes years or decades, when a country defaults on its ability to provide a suitable venue, the listed alternate is immediately awarded as the host city. Representatives from the Official Committee shared great confidence in Park City as a host. Chris P. Bacon, Selection Committee Chairman said, “The reality of the situation is that Utah just has the snow, with Utah resorts receiving north of 800″ this season, that really changed our hearts and minds.” Bacon went on to say, “Italy had the best interest of the athletes and the spectatorship in mind when they forfeited the host status for 2026.”
Park City is slated to host multiple sports, and events in 2026. Historically, host cities have seven years to prepare for the dramatic influx of visitors from around the world. While this is not Park City’s first rodeo the accelerated timeline won’t allow for the planned upgrades to the existing bobsled, luge, and skeleton track. Therefore, those sports will take place on Main Street, Park City taking advantage of the natural features and sloping streets.
Park City’s nine-time bobsled, luge, and skeleton announcer Walter Melon told TownLift,
“The most exciting part will be the loop-de-loop or kreisel as the perennial podium Germans call it, on the roof of the Post Office.”
The Nordic Ski Jump will see a similar relocation. Athletes will ride the Town Lift up and ski down the run that goes to Old Town. They’ll jump over the aforementioned bobsled track, over Main St., landing on the roof of the City Hall.
Park City’s Peg Legge, the Team Nordic Combined Jr. National Co-Champion, told TownLift, “Ski Jumping over Main Street during the Winter Games sounds pretty thrilling to me.”
Park City officials say the use of existing downtown structures and local streets will be the only way Park City can accommodate the accelerated timeline and infrastructure needs in 2026.
Tickets to will be available for sale on April 1, and in an effort to smooth over relationships with the community, the events will be free to all Park City residents.
Those interested in getting tickets can use the code APRIL FOOLS at checkout.
This article is to be considered satire, parody, surrealism, and humor. Any resemblance to actual persons, businesses, or events is entirely coincidental or is intended purely as satire, parody or spoof of such persons and is not intended to communicate any true or factual information about that person, event or place.